By, Ascellia M. Arenas
Earlier this week the amen corner got together to body shame Patrice Brown, #techerbae; but, nobody seems to be irate about the buff, tattooed NY elementary school teacher, Jamel Fenner. Women are salivating, sending him meals, and hoping their child gets in hot water at school just so they will have a reason to have a private conversation with him. Fenner is also a semi-pro boxer and, according to his social media accounts, a single father.
Get this, his Instagram, name is “imwhygirlscheat” and has almost 12,000 followers. He appreciates the marijuana and partakes of a toke right on his public Instagram page along with pictures of his well chiseled shirtless body. Interestingly, he is applauded for doing the job that most refuse. He’s even considered to be a “father figure” to his young students.
Why can we see him as being a happy, healthy human being with a full and rich life in addition to being an educator as his profession? Why aren’t we wagging our fingers at him for having his shirt off on social media? Why do we condemn Patrice Brown for wearing a body flattering dresses? She even wears them with a cardigan and boots, for crying out loud?
I’m calling a flag on the play here. This is another example of the double standards that are overlooked or considered acceptable in our society. If a man does it, it’s okay, but a woman can not. Pure BS… But Jamel is fine as frog hair though 😜
Mother, writer, teacher, and bonvivant. Follow me everywhere @Cellibration
“Oh, yes, I know ‘so-and-so’…We are just friends… ” the common reply of men and women who have multiple sex partners and don’t want to be cornered in to the “relationship” category for many and varied reasons. The reasons may be that she is financially insecure, he doesn’t like her family, she has issues and baggage from previous failed relationships, the excuses [reasons] go on and on. The bottom line is this, and ladies and gentlemen take stock in the information I am about to provide here because yes, I am talking to you SPECIFICALLY. If the man who shares your bed, bathroom, broom closet, backseat of your jeep, couch, or wherever you allow him to hit it and quit it, is not your “MAN”, you should think twice before answering that next “booty text.” Yes, I said text because, if the guy I mentioned above is contacting you, he most definitely is texting so the real “woman”, can’t hear your conversation! Vice-versa for women, as well.
Ladies, “Scientists have discovered that a sizeable minority of women have Y-chromosome gene sequences in their blood. Y-chromosomes are the chromosomes that belong to men.” How do you think they got there? Hmmmm….
Some may say that the answer would be from pregnancy with a male son, every woman who has been pregnant still carries cells from her fetus within her bloodstream. FYI- “cells from pregnancy will reside within the mother’s bloodstream and organs for the rest of her life. Even if the pregnancy was terminated or if there was a miscarriage these said genes would remain with the Mother.” (2015) The name for this condition, it is called microchimerism. This does not explain the number of women who have never been pregnant nor have given birth to a son.
There was a study conducted by immunologists at the Fred Hutchinson Caner Center in 2004. “In this study they took samples from 120 women who had never had sons. They found that 21% of these women had male DNA. The women were then categorized into 4 groups according to pregnancy history: Group A had only daughters, Group B had one or more miscarriage(s), Group C had induced abortions and Group D had never been pregnant before. The prevalence of male michrochimerism was considerably greater in Group C although it was still present in each group. Group A 8%, Group B 22%, Group C 57% and Group D 10%.” (2015)
The conclusions of this study lists possible sources of male michrochimerism included, known pregnancies, miscarriages, vanished male twin, or sexual intercourse. So, this proves that through intercourse there is a potential for women to hold onto male genes and DNA within their organs and blood stream for their entire life! Think about that when you hook up with a guy at the club, or find a date off of backpage.com. Your sexual activity, or lack thereof, has a lasting effect on your DNA.
People who follow holistic medicine and who are naturalists, and spiritualists have known this-now scientifically proven fact, for centuries. They believe that every time you sleep with somebody you are taking on a part of them within you. Not just their spiritual energy but their DNA stays, commingles, and becomes part of you. There is a stronger implication here, “as women [we] are capable of taking on actual physical DNA from the men that we sleep with.”
Ineffect, science has put a whole new meaning on sexual intercourse, “it is a very sacred and spiritual act and should be completely regarded as such.” You can not think of sex as just being a physical function similar to eating, sleeping, or using the bathroom. Reportedly, “many people are misusing sex and have forgotten what it is meant for and how important and consecrated it really is.” Many women have taken the social cues from mainstream media, music and entertainment and have desensitized themselves from the act of sex as, “not a big deal,” or “as a feminist act of freedom” to have indiscriminate sexual encounters and or casual sexual encounters with “friends” and “associates.” Many men and women are giving away sex somewhat freely because of insecurity, or to please or impress the opposite sex without actually even realizing how irresponsible it is.
Look at the high rate of unplanned pregnancies, HIV, HPV, chlamydia, and other STI’s, all because, at the time, it was “just sex.” When we become indiscriminate in our practice of our human sexuality and when we are completely disconnected from ourselves, it doesn’t seem like it’s a big deal.
Recently, comedian & Oscar winning Actress Mo’Nique and her husband, Sidney Harris, appeared on an episode of the talk show, “The Preachers,” and discussed their ideas about having an open marriage.
The couple host a podcast , “Mo’Nique & Sidney’s Open Relationship” where they discuss how their 10 year marriage has worked because of their honesty.
Clearly, many people feel that casual sex and open relationships aren’t really a big deal…Oh, but it is!
In agreement with the author, I have always believed, the following sentiment:
“Now, being older and more connected to my spiritual self I realize that sex is not something that is meant to be thrown around and given out so freely, it is a sacred act that creates a bond between two people [who] love and care about each other. It is so important for us (humanity) to realize this. There is a lot of power and amazing potential within this act and it has the complete capability of connecting us with our true selves.”-Alana Ketler (2014)
In our lifetimes we have been faced with many personal sexual dilemmas, we have made fourth quarter decisions that coud have been life altering but because of our arousal, and or care and concern for our partner, we may have allowed the exchange of our spirit and our DNA. When you lay down with someone you don’t love, you are carrying that negative spirit and you re becoming bound to that person. In exchange of sweat, saliva, semen, breath, you are giving your sexual partner an intimate piece of you. Sex is not a recreational activity. It is sacred and has many physical, mental, and spiritual implications connected to it. Unless you are willing to share LOVE on that level, keep your pants on and wait for who deserves you.
It was January 1, 2005 and my sister took me to The Yoga Connection in Davie, Fl for a “hot yoga class”. She said she wanted to try a class she had been hearing about. She wanted me to go with her because I was gaining a lot of weight and I was stressed out of my mind. Being as I had taken dance for a number of years, I enjoyed movement and dance classes, I even coached award winning cheerleading teams, and I was naturally very flexible, she thought I’d be good at it.
The class consists of 26 poses in a heated or humid room. When the instructor saw my bow pose ( Dhanurasana), she thought I had taken yoga for years. I was a mere novice. Needless to say, I physically enjoyed the challenge and my natural flexibility found acceptance in a new and honorable way. The benefits of that hot yoga class were amazing! It provided me with a potent detoxifying experience, full body strengthening and elongation, and an overwhelmingly intense feeling of relaxation.
Now, some ten years later, I still practice yoga and I have even considered becoming a certified instructor. Maybe I will one day, I don’t feel any pressure to do so. Yoga teaches you to let go. If it is to be a part of my journey, then it will be.
As for now, I enjoy practicing in my little sacred space built into my new bedroom. With no gym at my disposal, I put the weights down and lift my body weight instead. Yoga helps me to feel relaxed and focused on what really matters in life. The years following my first yoga experience were a challenge. For seven years, 2007-2014, I was under such an intense amount of stress and anxiety : it is amazing that I’m still here. Had I been more deliberate with practicing maybe the events of my life would have been different. I am more aware now, and practicing at least three days a week.
Consider yoga as a way to learn about yourself, to improve your mind/body connection, and to soften the way in which you interact with others and yourself.
Some added benefits of practicing yoga are as follows:
Today is Women’s Day, and I could not be more proud of my cousin, Christina Arenas, than I am today! She posted over 50 pictures to her social media accounts that give us a peek into what she is currently doing to provide clean water and sustainable filtration systems in Ethiopia.
She recently shared some of her experiences in her blog. She writes, “Addis is the capital of Ethiopia, and it is indeed a developing city. There’s construction everywhere!! What I found most refreshing about the development is that most of the businesses are Ethiopian owned and operated. Which allows for great economic opportunities for Ethiopians. Although they are making much progress, the poverty is clearly noticed. But you would never know that they were living in poverty due to the pride they have for their nation. It is inspirational to see the hope, strength and the endless possibilities for this country.
While I am here I will be researching the benefits of integrating Sanitation and Hygiene Services with Improved Water Services for schools and communities in urban and rural areas. I will be able to witness the progress WaterAid Ethiopia has contributed to Ethiopia achieving the United Nation’s Millennium Development Goals.” Discover more here.
Arenas will return to the US very soon, and I am sure that she will have lots to say about her journey. Here are a few photos of the project, I hope her work inspires us all to do something! Make your actions speak louder than your words. #grow
So, I am starting the New Year off right. All through the month of December I monitored my food intake, participated in a 50 mile challenge, and I started to drink Shakeology. I know you are wondering what it is a “Shakeology”? And, you are thinking, “NO WAY you ran 50 miles!!!”
Well, yes I did! In 20 days I ran 50 miles both indoors and outdoors. I also lost 10 pounds 🙂
Now, how did I muster the energy? Lots of water; drink lots of water!!!! I drink at least 65 oz. a day.
This is me on the last day of the 50 mile challenge! So proud 🙂
I’ve added something new to my fitness plan. Let me tell you about Shakeology. I have been drinking one a day for almost two weeks now. I do feel some differences in my energy levels, my recuperation time, and in my digestion. I will also add that I felt a cold coming on on Christmas Eve, I drank a Shakeology shake and took two zinc tablets and I was good to go! That threatening cold was ZAPPED! Here is what is in Shakeology, and the benefits of drinking a shake at least once per day.
This is my quick chocolate fix! I love chocolate, so that’s a strong endorsement. Whip it with almond milk and ice and it tastes like a Wendy’s Frosty!!! Yummm 🙂
What’s in Shakeology?
Protein and Essential Amino Acids to help build muscle and reduce food cravings*
• Help build and repair muscles
• Reduce hunger and food cravings
• Promote healthy skin, hair, and nails
• Chocolate and Greenberry Shakeology include whey protein isolate, an easily absorbable source of high-quality protein that’s ideal for building and maintaining lean muscle mass. Tropical Strawberry and Vegan Chocolate include high-quality plant proteins from brown rice, pea and other sources. Essential amino acids, found in these proteins, help the body repair muscle tissue and heal wounds; and reduce hunger pangs. The protein in all Shakeology products provides a highly bioavailable source of essential amino acids.
Prebiotics, Probiotics and Digestive Enzymes, which aid in improving digestion, regularity, and nutrient absorption*
• Aids digestion
• Support a healthy intestinal tract
• Increase absorption of nutrients
• Shakeology contains many ingredients that are beneficial to the digestive system.
• Prebiotics, natural components of certain plants, help support the “friendly” bacteria in your digestive tract.
• Probiotics are strains of live good bacteria that help with the digestive process. They assist the body in absorbing
nutrients and minerals, bring an overall balance to the digestive tract, and help support the immune system.
• Digestive enzymes, from sources such as pineapples and papayas, help your body break down food into its individual
components, making the nutrients easier to absorb.
• Help promote a strong immune system
• Help increase energy
• Help protect the body from stress
• Help balance endocrine hormones and the immune system
• Adaptogens are special herbs that grow in harsh climates and conditions, at high elevations, atop mountains where the soil is rocky and oxygen in the air is thin. Because these plants have to adapt to harsh conditions, they have highly
concentrated nutrients that can help your body cope with stress, provide energy, and maintain a strong immune system. Shakeology has a total of 9 adaptogens. Which is more than any other shake out there.
Antioxidants and phytonutrients (plant-sourced ingredients) may help maintain health*
• Help neutralize harmful free radicals
• Help decrease inflammation
• Help maintain the immune system
• Potentially decrease the risk of degenerative diseases
• Many of Shakeology’s fruit and vegetable sources have been chosen for their high concentration of healthy natural substances known as phytonutrients, including flavonoids, polyphenols, anthocyanins, and catechins. These substances have antioxidant properties, meaning they help neutralize molecules known as free radicals, which damage cells and may contribute to the aging process. In laboratory tests, phytonutrients have shown promise in helping prevent a wide variety of degenerative conditions.
23 Vitamins and Minerals your body needs to function for optimal health*
• Get a wide range of essential nutrients
• Get your necessary vitamins every day
• Make up for dietary deficiencies
• Most of us don’t get the complete range of essential vitamins and minerals in our daily diets. Some important vitamins, such as vitamin C and the B vitamins, are water-soluble, meaning they’re flushed out of your body after a short time and need to be replenished regularly. Others, like vitamin E, can be difficult to get enough of in food. Shakeology Chocolate and Greenberry provide all these nutrients in an easy-to-take form, so you never have to worry. (Tropical Strawberry and Vegan Chocolate do not have the vitamin and mineral ingredients added.)
*These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.
Warning: Processed in a facility that also processes soy, peanuts, tree nuts, milk, egg, fish and shellfish.
This product should be used as a dietary supplement only. Those with medical concerns should consult their physician prior to using this or any other dietary supplement.