Monthly Archives: December 2014

New Year, New You? Real “Resolutions” Require Resolve

Standard
New Year, New You? Real “Resolutions” Require Resolve

By Celli Arenas

IMG_3872.JPG

Funny!!! I said I was going to take a break from writing until after the new year, but clearly I can not. We do what we were created to do, and we do so effortlessly. I am a writer. Period. If you are a jerk, effortlessly, it is going to be hard for you to become a “better you”. Unless you are going to be a bigger jerk, or a jerkier-jerk.

Let’s try this. Change yourself for the better. Start internally with who you are on the inside. Really reflect on who you are as a person and start the change from within. You can make lots of money, wear the fanciest clothes, drive the best cars, wear the finest jewels, take the best most exotic vacations, and be seen rubbing elbows with famous people; but if you are a world class, rich, handsome/pretty, well dressed asshole…you have work to do. Get that in check for the new year, do us all that favor, please… Thank You!

Here is what I’m going to resolve to do…

1. Mind my business! I neglected my gifts and talents to try to please/impress other people last year. I had to “prove myself” as being good enough, only to be shown that my best was not respected or appreciated at all. What did I learn? Some people do not deserve my effort, interest, nor respect. I recognize it, accept it, and I have moved on.
2. Call people out on the BS when I see it and hear it. Do not insult my intelligence. Enough said.
3. Be better not bitter. People assume that because I call out the BS, that I am angry or bitter. No, I am better. I used to actually care about what people think and I used to craft eloquent and diplomatic responses to appear compassionate to both sides. Well, that’s done. I’m not bitter because I recognize BS when I hear it and see it. Be prepared to present the facts when you attempt to persuade me.

Last but not least, you can pick up both of my books at amazon.com! There is a lot more in store for 2015, I can’t wait!

Celli Arenas

Celli Arenas

Celli Arenas, published author, has been featured in several magazines, such as: MIA Magazine, Success Magazine, Legacy Magazine. She is the host blogger at http://www.cellibration.com, and hosts MIA-Live.net for BlogTalk Radio. She has also published two books, “30 Days of Dynamic Pursuit” a self-help journal, and “Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me”, a coming of age novel, both are available at amazon.com.

Follow@sidetrackedbook on Instagram & Twitter

Holiday Love: Let’s Talk About Sex, Again!

Standard
Holiday Love: Let’s Talk About Sex, Again!

Holiday Love: Let’s Talk About Sex, Again!

By, Celli Arenas

This is the last installment of the Holiday Love Series. I am thankful that I had the ability to write quality pieces about love, relationships, expectations, with scientific research to support all of them; and then, to be able to share all of this on my blog with you, was the best of all. I’m grateful for this talent and I’m more than happy to produce these pieces.

The most popular article in the series was the “Let’s Talk About Sex” piece. So, here we go, “Let’s Talk About Sex…Again!”

IMG_3324Yes, the holidays are about religious celebrations, family, friends, shopping and unfortunately stress. Sometimes we can allow the stress of the season to overshadow the most important reason for celebrating the holidays, love. Love is the basis of all religious celebration. The basic purpose of religion is to teach us the importance of love.

As adults we are able to express one form of love together. Adults experience romantic love in many ways, one of the ways we like the best though, is through sex. When the stress of the season overpowers everything else, we are presented with a sex problem.

 

What’s The “Sex” Problem?

The biggest stress culprits are unrealistic expectations. Unrealistic expectations take a toll on both men and women. Stress affects men and women in different ways. According to my research, “Single women in a relationship may be hoping for that diamond. Mothers are hoping to find the perfect gifts and create perfect family rituals.” Women want perfection. IMG_3278Fantasy of how things “should” be according to the media and consumer driven commercial advertisements about the holidays, can cause women to spiral into depression and thus not want sex or become incapable of orgasm. Women become depressed if they are alone, without a significant other, or without children, especially during the holidays. I have not found convincing evidence that the same pressure for perfection exists for men.

I read this in regard to the female perspective, “Yet, somehow for both single women and married ones, sex plays an important role. And statistics show – based on the number of births in August and September – that holidays are a time for loving and conception.” Apparently, in addition to wanting holiday perfection, women want to get it on! So, men, you might make the lady in your life very happy if you give her a few big “O’s” this holiday, and I don’t mean Oprah.

Romance is Priceless

IMG_3311For partners, set aside some time between now and the New Year to rekindle simple loving moments. Put the kids to bed, and make some time for each other. Date night, a scheduled time in which you prioritize him or her, can make a huge difference. Make the effort to do good things that make you happy and the reasons to be unhappy will drift away.

 

Weird Science

So here’s where the scientific analysis joins the conversation:

IMG_3312According to Psychology Today, a study on singles and sex reveals the following : “if we look at enjoyment – judged by orgasm – a recent analysis of single women and men ages 21 – 65 the results were as follows:
“Mean occurrence rate for experiencing orgasm during sexual activity with a familiar partner was 62.9% among single women and 85.1% among single men for which there was little variation in the mean rate based on sexual orientation. For women, however, mean occurrence rate of orgasm varied significantly by sexual orientation: heterosexual women 61.6%, lesbian women 74.7%, bisexual women 58.0%.”

What does that mean? Basically, men enjoy sex with someone familiar more than women do. Men can achieve orgasm with greater reliability and frequency than women, regardless of orientation. So, in other words, men…we already know you achieve a “happy ending,”
your woman would like to achieve the same. Thank you.

How Do You Give Her The Big O?

1. Set a romantic mood. Create an experience. Clean, comfortable is the usual expectation. Go a little deeper, engage all of her senses. The right lighting, music, scents, tastes (food, drinks,sweets) check these links for specifics

Holiday Love: Boost Your Libido With Tasty Treats

IMG_3405Holiday Love: It’s Scientific: Get Busy!

Holiday Love: Let’s Talk About Sex

Holiday Love : It’s The Little Things

Holiday Love: The Gift of Lingerie

2. Create gratitude lists. You may not have a lot of money to purchase expensive gifts. The thought that you put in to spending time with her is exponentially more valuable. Tell her why you appreciate her presence in your life. You have to say it. Do not assume that she already knows. This applies to women too. We have to tell men what we like, and what we don’t like. YourIMG_3314 wanting to experience things and have nice things does not make you a gold digger or a spoiled brat. You deserve to have a good time and you are worthy of nice things. This is all about communication. Gratitude and appreciation are as significant and important as a purse or new shoes. Your significant other should understand that you love nice things but who you are as a person is much more valuable than anything you can buy at a store. Express that value.

3. FREE GIFT IDEA::: create a love letter expressing your gratitude:: Hand written, on stationary, sealed in an envelope and mail it to him or her through the US Postal Service. Make the effort to write out the reasons you are grateful for the special someone in your life. This gesture is so incredible. What’s usually in the mailbox? Bad news, bills, and junk is usually all that is there. To get a letter from someone you love is amazing. Take the time to create it, especially for those who are experiencing financial difficulty this holiday season, it will be appreciated. Love is free.

According to the experts, “In a study by Dr. Amie Gordon and colleagues, published in “The Journal of Personality and Social Psychology,” it was reported that couples who expressed appreciation were more committed, more responsive, and more likely to stay together. The authors noted “These findings provide evidence that gratitude is important for the successful maintenance of intimate bonds.”IMG_3328

As we have learned from the past 11 articles, oxytocin is the hormone that helps to create the bond of love, safety, and acceptance. We have to do things to stimulate that hormone, to keep the spark lit and keep us wanting more! Do more. Put out there what you want to receive. It will be worth it!

I hope that you enjoyed my series of articles about holiday love and that your holiday is magnificent. Happy Holidays from my family to yours!

Celli Arenas

Celli Arenas

Celli Arenas, published author, has been featured in several magazines, such as: MIA Magazine, Success Magazine, Legacy Magazine. She is the host blogger at http://www.cellibration.com, and hosts MIA-Live.net for BlogTalk Radio. She has also published two books, “30 Days of Dynamic Pursuit” a self-help journal, and “Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me”, a coming of age novel, both are available at amazon.com.

Follow@sidetrackedbook on Instagram & Twitter

References

1. Beth Skwarecki, Is there a season for births?, DoubleX Science: site powered by an IDEA grant from the National Association of Science Writers. February 2013

2. Justin R. Garcia et al., “Variation in Orgasm Occurrence by Sexual Orientation in a Sample of U.S. Singles,” The Journal of Sexual Medicine, Volume 11, Issue 11, pages 2645–2652, November 2014

3. Amie M. Gordon et al., “To have and to hold: Gratitude promotes relationship maintenance in intimate bonds,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Vol 103(2), Aug 2012, 257-274

4. Bridging the Love, Sex, and Gratitude Gap , Watson, Psychology Today

Holiday Love: 50 Great Gift Ideas For The Lady In Your Life

Standard
Holiday Love: 50 Great Gift Ideas For The Lady In Your Life

By Celli Arenas

If you really love her, if you can’t see her or you with anybody else, go for it, & do it now! The holidays are the perfect time to propose. Remember, the greatest gift in the world is love; it’s priceless, but rings are not…Get her a ring that she will truly appreciate. Check out some beautiful sparklers here.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

So, okay…you’re too chicken to take that leap of faith and make a commitment. Fine, hold on a little longer, observe her, get to know her, grow to accept her family as being a part of her, but position yourself in her life so that her bond with you is even stronger.

Here are some safer gift ideas for the lady you like (but aren’t ready to marry, yet). These gifts may keep her around for a little while longer while you try to figure things out.

1. Tickets to a show, Cirque Du Soleil is in Miami this holiday season.

Cirque Du Soleil Amaluna

Cirque Du Soleil Amaluna

2. A magazine subscription is a great gift that lasts all year. Women love magazines.

3. Beats by Dre Headphones in her favorite color. Cute!

Beats by Dre

Beats by Dre

4. Specialty playing cards, for your gambling girl.

5. A best-selling book, like “Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me” (hint, hint)

6. A movie and dinner at a dinner theater. Check your local theaters to see if there is one in your part of town.
www.amctheatres.com/

7. Kindle Fire or iPad and a download of “Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me“. Excellent gift!

Kindle

8. A gift basket with her favorite wine, cheese, and crackers.

Hickory Farm Gift Basket

Hickory Farm Gift Basket

.

9. Tickets to a Miami Heat Game. (hello…anybody here?)

10. A set of DVD‘s themed around her favorite actor, director or film era. (John Hughes, 80’s movies: Sixteen Candles, Pretty in Pink, Weird Science, The Breakfast Club).

11. A bottle of wine and a new board game. Notice that wine is mentioned here, a lot. Can’t go wrong with wine!

Red wine

Red wine

12. Egyptian Cotton pajamas…because flannel is for your grandma.

13. Silk robe …because flannel is for your grandma.

14. Custom ordered monogrammed stationery, because she is fancy and you like that about her.

15. A Spa Day at a luxury spa (no strip mall deals).  Strip mall salons/spas are fine for routine maintenance, but it is the holiday season.  Step your game up!

Mandarin Oriental

Mandarin Oriental Spa Miami

16. A monogrammed set of sheets, bath sheets, hand towels, socks, etc. Anything with HER initials on it, will let her know that you put forth effort to get her something unique.

17. A designer clutch. Smaller versions of designer bags are usually less expensive and  more affordable.

18. A Gift Card to Bloomingdales or Nordstrom’s. She may catch a great sale!

19. A set of deluxe makeup brushes. Sephora has lots of great gifts for your lady friend(s) [players with multiple babes].

Deluxe Makeup Brush Set

Deluxe Makeup Brush Set

20. A monogrammed makeup bag. Again, her initials, her territory! She likes that.

21. A hair makeover (new style, length, texture, color). Spice things up with a “new thing.”

22. A boudoir photo session with an experienced photographer. Ultimate sexy gift for the both of you.

IMG_3467

23. Precious stone jewelry. Not a diamond, yet…but getting closer!

24. A candle…because candles are sexy.

Blue Sage Boutique

Blue Sage Boutique

25. All-natural soaps. I love patchouli soap by Zum Bar. What an aphrodisiac!

Zum Bar Soap

Zum Bar Soap

26. Holistic beauty treatments such as bath salts and scented astringents, body washes.

Blue Sage Boutique

Blue Sage Boutique

27. A crystal vase. Fill it with flowers too, by the way.

Crystal Vase

Crystal Vase

28. A throw for the couch…for when you are “watching a movie.”

Faux Fur Throw

Faux Fur Throw

29. A crafted personal project: photo album or scrapbook. Cute idea for your first Holiday, (after one year).

30. Assorted jars of olives, pickles, jams and marmalades. I’m reaching…I know. I hope she doesn’t throw them at you, lol. Get her this if she is over 30 years old, and knows the value of good olives.

31. Her favorite cake or pastry. Again, I hope she doesn’t throw it at you! Get her this if you’ve been dating for a short period of time, like a week.

Cakes

Cakes

32. Dance lessons: introductory ballroom, salsa or flamenco dance class, (twerk & pole dancing count too)…I’m just saying…

33. Nice workout gear. Matching joggers with great athletic shoes, this is an awesome gift! If she doesn’t work out regularly, don’t try it. You might not last for New Years.

Workout Gear

Workout Gear

34. A flight bag, camera case or classy travel kit monogrammed with her initials! Put her name on anything and you WIN! Oh yeah, take her somewhere where she can use it, and you win. Travel wins…FYI.

35. A class in something she’s interested in learning more about ( real estate, cosmetology, insurance, bond surety).  If you help a woman discover an opportunity that will improve the quality of her life, she will know that she matters to you.  That’s important.

36. A session with a personal trainer, Pilates instructor, reflexologist or nutritionist. Help her achieve the goals she set for herself. Don’t try to CHANGE her into someone else. Support her by listening to what she wants to do for herself with her own life and support that.  Don’t try to recreate her into what you think is a “better” person.  That’s rude.

37. A hot new gadget. Go to Radio Shack or shop at amazon to discover the latest in tech gear. Grab her something innovative.

38. Gardening tools, a flowering plant or a gift certificate to her local gardening center. Just please, avoid buying her a hoe (for obvious reasons).

39. Vintage perfume tray, with a perfume atomizer. Very nice gift, especially when paired with a new fragrance.

perfume tray

perfume tray

40. A matching accessories set like a matching hat and scarf, and sunglasses.  A nice gift for seasonal locations.  Her gift must be useful.

amazon shop

amazon shop

41. A Keurig machine with gourmet coffee, for when you are still around in the morning for breakfast.

42. Sushi-making supplies; and FRESH ingredients to make some sushi magic with.

43. A fabulous bottle of champagne, Perrier-Jouët is my favorite.  She may or may not have a favorite, so trust me on this one.

44. Dinner to a five-star restaurant: Prime 112, is a beautiful restaurant nestled on a quiet corner on South Beach in Miami, Florida. An after dinner stroll down Collins, makes for a fantastic shared experience. Am I recommending that you take her on a trip to Miami.  Yes, take her somewhere…sheesh!

45. Luxe table linens, napkin rings and place card holders, for your first dinner that you host together.

46. Godiva chocolates…enough said.

47. Caviar, foie gras and brie, just because she may not have ever had her own.

48. A deluxe picnic basket. Make use of it too! Fill it with dinner and make her gift a surprise event.

49. A custom crafted recipe book with recipes of meals you’ve shared together. Show her that you remember the little things.

50. An Ugly Christmas Sweater. Then surprise her by gathering a few friends who are also wearing Ugly Christmas Sweaters at your very own Ugly Christmas Sweater Party.

Ugly Christmas Sweater Party

Ugly Christmas Sweater Party

The holidays are special, let her know that you think she is too. Don’t just say, “have a happy holiday season,” make it happen.

Get your copy of “Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me” , by Celli Arenas, today!

IMG_2956.JPG

Get your copies on Amazon.com

Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me

30 Days of Dynamic Pursuit

Follow @sidetrackedbook on Instagram & Twitter

IMG_3291IMG_3290

Holiday Love: Zodiac Holiday Gifts & Party Guide

Standard
Holiday Love: Zodiac Holiday Gifts & Party Guide

By, Celli Arenas

The holidays are here and gift giving can be a little hectic, especially if you don’t know what to buy.  Maybe you want to take that special someone out on a holiday date or to a holiday party, but you are not quite sure what will win her over. Have no fear, your holiday love guide is here! This zodiac guide will help you plan the best activities and snag the best gift for your honey this Holiday Season. We even threw some celebrity examples in there for fun!  All you need to say now is, “hey baby, what’s your sign?”

IMG_3710.JPG

Aries        Libra           Virgo        Capricorn    Taurus     Cancer       Scorpio          Aquarius
Gemini     Leo     Sagittarius       Pisces

Aries: March 21–Apr 19

Sign: Aries tends to be the leader of the pack, definitely fun and makes spur of the moment decisions. Big, bigger, the biggest is the best and Aries won’t be shy!

Holiday Party Plans: Make it fast-paced and fun. Aries has a short attention span.

The Aries’ Closet: Brightly colored sporty and casual styles. Formal wear doesn’t turn the Aries on.

Guilty Pleasure: Anything that says Aries is “#1.” Attention hungry Aries needs the spotlight!

Famous Aries: Mariah Carey, Jackie Chan, Robert Downey Jr., Maya Angelou, Emma Watson, Keira Knightley, and Lady Gaga.

Gifting : Give an Aries the gift that presents a challenge. Trying something new, like skydiving or race car driving will get the Aries going. Aries is a natural “BOSS” so a gift that helps advance his or her business will be appreciated. The energetic Aries would be happy with sports gear or tickets to a game…FYI-I heard Heat tickets are a steal this season, just a suggestion.

to the top

Taurus: Apr 20–May 20
Sign: Taurus’ are laid back and reliable. Taurus’ have a back-to-basics simplistic attitude and like to live comfortably.

Holiday Party Plans: Spending the day outdoors, hiking, fishing, walking the boardwalk or shopping for designer clothing and accessories, sounds like a fun plan to the Taurus. Taureans like an active lifestyle. For a party, the Taurus’ love attention to detail and a carefully planned event. They will plan for months just to gather the gang at a cozy lounge spot. Impress your Taurus with the littlest details for the biggest delight.

The Taurus’ Closet: Bling, Bling! Taurus loves stylish clothing in luxurious fabrics and fine jewelry.

Guilty Pleasures: Taurus men and women appreciate the good life, luxurious fabrics, and expensive dinners. Spoil the Taurus and he/she will be happy.

Famous Taurus’: Janet Jackson, Kandi Burruss, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, Channing Tatum, Chris Brown, Jessica Alba and George Clooney.

Gifting: Taurus’ are nature lovers so any outdoorsy gift will do well. Natural fibers (cotton, silk) wood, and stone will warm the Taurus’ heart. Taureans love music, a mix of funky tunes will please.  They are money-lovers, too; so, money clips, wallets, shares of stock, investments that are destined to glean great results, all win the heart of your Bull. They are suckers for shiny objects. They love to indulge in the finer things in life. Bring on the bling: designer clothing, luxurious accessories, and fine jewelry.
to the top

Gemini: May 21–June 20

Sign: The twins are chatty and fun! Gemini crave information and exude lots of energy.

Holiday Party Plans: Quiet time, cozy and relaxed, catching up on the reading list and discussing the juicy details of the plot sounds good to the Gemini. At night, an outdoor party with lots of activities: dancing, band and/or DJ, caroling, and buffet style food will bring the Gemini delight.

The Geminis’ Closet: Comfortable cotton or linen clothing to fit every occasion and situation. Lady Gemini’s need an equal number of matching handbags, take notes…

Guilty Pleasure: Information and communication are the delight of the Gemini. Geminis will bring their iPad & iPhone everywhere! A nice case for either or both make great gifts.

Famous Gemini: Andre 3000, Angelina Jolie, Carmelo Anthony, Johnny Depp, Ice Cube, Pam Grier, Natalie Portman, Mark Wahlberg, Gladys Knight.

Gifting: Give a Gemini anything that helps him communicate or sparks her imagination. They love multiples; so, build anticipation with a few small gifts that culminate in a BIG ONE! Small gifts that activate creativity or mental challenge go over big! Try Seduko or other puzzles.

to the top


Cancer: June 21–July 22

Sign: Cancers are nurturing and comforting, they value tradition and keep family close to their hearts. Sentimental Cancers are what Bobby Brown calls “tenderonis,” full of love.

Holiday Party Plans: Spend the day cooking a down-home dinner or grilling for relatives. Cancers like meal time, especially when it brings folks together. Cancers like intimate gatherings at home with close friends and family and lots of picture-taking. They really like to save the memories.

Guilty Pleasures: Cozy and homey, filled with antiques, family heirlooms and personal mementos are how the Cancer likes to live. Framed photographs of shared experiences touch the Cancer’s sweet heart. Comfort foods like macaroni and cheese, lasagna, French toast with powdered sugar and syrup, and chocolate cake make the Cancer feel loved.

Famous Cancers: 50 Cent, Jessica Simpson, Vin Diesel Fantasia Berrino, Ray Allen, Meryl Streep, Tom Hanks, Shannon Sharpe, Kevin Hart.

Gifting: Cancers are very sentimental so give them something that has personal meaning like a frame with a photo of your choice or a scrapbook with mementos of times you’ve shared. Tools and gadgets to improve the home also make the Cancer smile.

to the top

Leo: July 23–Aug 22

Sign: Leos are drama kings and queens! So dramatic and fiery, Leos love being the center of attention. Leos are also generous, warm-hearted, and above all, passionate.

Holiday Party Plans: Leos love to compete. Let them play a game, win and get a round of applause from everyone involved. The Leo needs to feel superior. A larger-than-life outdoor party with tiki torches, floating candles, and the spotlight on the Leo, who will don a tiara or crown, will make the season bright.

The Leos’ Closet: Luxury labels, or well-known brand names are a must. Leo ladies love big designer bags (the bigger the better) and animal prints.

Guilty Pleasures: Poker nights, dressing up and lush Casino settings drive the Leo wild.

Famous Leos: Barack Obama, Halle Berry, Madonna, Jennifer Lopez, Megan Good, Martha Stewart, Robert De Niro, and Tom Brady.

Gifting: Leos love being treated like royalty and lavished with all things extravagant. Big branded designer bags, fine jewelry and animal prints are good ideas for the Leo. You can also cater to Leo’s playful side by giving the hottest new gaming system or board game.

to the top

Virgo: Aug 23–Sept 22

Sign: Virgos are detailed, focused and are on a never-ending quest for perfection and knowledge.

Holiday Party Plans: Reading a book, taking a pet for a walk and organizing things around  the house sounds like a fun afternoon for the Virgo.  When it is party time, a neat and organized affair with well-thought-out centerpieces, décor and sumptuous cocktails make the Virgo happy.

The Virgos’ Closet: Classic tailored looks paired with a few colorful accessories. Conservative colors, black, blue, and gray are staples in the Virgo wardrobe.

Guilty Pleasures: The Virgo is super organized and efficient. The Virgo loves tidiness and order.

Famous Virgos: Michael Jackson, Beyoncé, Jennifer Hudson, Jada Pinkett-Smith, Cameron Diaz, Lance Armstrong, Ludacris, P!nk, Nas, KeKe Palmer, Adam Sandler, Celli Arenas😉

Gifting: For Virgos, the more practical the gift, the better. They like items they can put to use right away like organizing tools, desk units, tablets, application/programs. Virgos need their lives to be in order. A new gadget, cell phone, tablet, or an electronic multi-language dictionary would be a great gift. Virgos are usually disciplined about their health too, and enjoy gifts that keep them in tip-top shape. Work out gear, sneakers, weights, exercise machines will light up the Virgo like a Christmas Tree.

to the top


Libra: Sept 23–Oct 22

Sign: The Libras’ scales are a sign of harmony and partnership. Libras are social and strive for balance. Libras have artistic talents and great analytical skills.

Holiday Party Plans: Libras love to get everybody together for a celebration. Don’t leave any VIP’s off the list.

The Libras’ Closet:  The Libra has superb taste and a very critical eye.  A lady Libra always knows what to wear.  The male Libra is fashionable as well, he takes a while to choose which outfit best suits. Female Libras have chic tastes and dare to be different by dressing up classic cuts with an unexpected accessory, for flair.

Guilty Pleasures: Libras love jewelry like rings and cuff links for men. For women, any kind of jewelry is a great gift. Musical instruments, concerts and downloading the latest tracks online to create an exclusive music list for your Libra Sweetheart are awesome gift ideas. Libras appreciate the good life, they especially like gourmet dining and Egyptian cotton bedding, so keep that in mind.

Famous Libras: Usher, Serena Williams, Gwyneth Paltrow, Will Smith, Gwen Stefani, Snoop Dog, Toni Braxton.

Gifting: Libras don’t care about the price as long as you choose something well-designed or beautiful. Libras love experiences that they can share with you or another friend like a wine tasting class or concert tickets. If you can connect the gift to heartfelt reasons, you will win points with your Libra Love.

to the top


Scorpio: Oct 23–Nov 21

Sign: Mysterious and curious, Scorpios are born detectives but like to keep their own lives private. Scorpios are full of intensity, passion and power.

Holiday Party Plans: Scorpios won’t make a big deal out of their event but will expect everyone else to.  Scorpios want you to remember it, all of it. Impressive fêtes are important to the Scorpio, so the devil is in the details.

The Scorpios’ Closet: Dark and mysterious, deep reds and burgundy fabrics adorn the Scorpio’s lair. Also, sexy Scorpio ladies will likely have a secret stash of sexy lingerie.

Guilty Pleasures: Home life may consist of functional and uncluttered pieces with crystal accents. Anything that creates an air of mystery: candles, water accents, big sunglasses, a sultry fragrance or a locked box are all enchanting gifts for the Scorpio.

Famous Scorpios: Nelly, Julia Roberts, Gabrielle Union-Wade, Diddy, Martin Scorsese, Leonardo DiCaprio, Rev Run.

Gifting: Lover of secrets, Scorpios like to uncover them. A mysterious letter sending them on a hunt for a sexy surprise will keep your Scorpio simmering. The scavenger hunt, equipped with anything that helps their detective skills like binoculars, a spy novel, or a trail of rose petals will turn your Scorpio up from simmer to sizzle. Scorpios love romance so a seductive gift will win. Pamper her with a massage or a beautifully scented bath set and the stinger will be delighted.

to the top


Sagittarius: Nov 22–Dec 21

Sign: Sagittarius’ are impulsive, philosophical and naturally optimistic, always on the move and always thinking.

Holiday Party Plans: A spur-of-the-moment pop-up party would be a delight. The Sagittarius likes outdoor events, so a nature inspired scene or an outdoor bonfire with friends will make your Sagittarius smile.

The Sagittarius’ Closet:  The Archer is not big on fashion, and does not really care about making a statement.  The Sagittarius dresses in comfortable clothes that allow freedom of movement and can handle the tough stuff.  Clothing made from hemp or other natural fibers is preferred. Lady Sagittarius like long skirts, ponchos and loose-fitting jeans.  Jeans and tee shirts suits the Sagittarius male just fine.  He likes sturdy work boots or a great pair of athletic shoes, as well.

Guilty Pleasures: Jokes and pranks are enjoyable treats for the Sagittarius. Throw her a surprise theme party with lots of holiday activities and full of hokey gags, too! Make him the center of attention at a holiday event/birthday party and his heart is all yours.

Famous Sagittarius : Raven Symone, Jay Z, Jon Stewart, Tyra Banks, Trey Songs, Samuel Jackson, Brad Pitt.

Gifting: Adventurous Sagittarius’ like it wild and spontaneous! An experiential gift like a hot air balloon ride, new golf clubs or tennis equipment will be a great gift. Perhaps stimulate their mind with a philosophy book or a hot yoga class. Spring for equestrian lessons or a day at the races to make the half-horse Sagittarius sing!

to the top


Capricorn: Dec 22–Jan 19

Sign: Capricorns are ambitious and reliable. They are always climbing to get to the top.

Holiday Party Plans: Planning their next conquest during a long run or spinning class sounds like a sweet cup of tea for the Capricorn. A dinner party with family and friends where the Capricorn sits at the head of the table is the best of the holiday spectaculars.

The Capricorns’ Closet:  The stylish Capricorn is most comfortable in business suits and no-nonsense heels. The Capricorn is an expert shopper, and can find the best deals on shoes and apparel.
What The Capricorn saves on clothes, they splurge on accessories. Expensive jewelry is simple, and elegant.

Guilty Pleasures : Homes with photos of the entire family lining the staircase walls, fine art, ceramics, clocks and watches are signature pieces; all classic style elements favored by the Capricorn.

Famous Capricorns: Shonda Rhimes, Muhammad Ali, Tyrese, Debbie Allen, Kate Moss, Tiger Woods, Dolly Parton, David Bowie.

Gifting: A desk set or a restored family photo is nice, but you can also please a Capricorn with a gift that’s the exact opposite of their staid image. Gift something that they’d consider too indulgent to buy for themselves like sexy lingerie or a spa day, if they like to be touched. A Capi-Girl might like a bedazzled letter opener or a sterling silver set from Tiffany’s. Encourage the Capricorns’ creative side, a craft kit or a new camera might ignite a creative spark.

to the top


Aquarius: Jan 20–Feb 18

Sign : Aquarius’ are eccentric and individualistic. No two water bearers are alike. Aquarius’ have a knack for seeing new uses for old things and are surprisingly socially conscious, recycling and conservation are close to an Aquarian’s heart.

Holiday Party Plans: An impromptu ski trip for a weekend in the mountains would be delightful.  An Aquarius loves to have a big bash with all of their friends at least once a year. Holiday time, like New Years Eve, makes for a grand celebration.

The Aquarius’ Closet: Quirky, unique, vintage pieces and unexpected combinations catch the Aquarius’ eye. Turquoise, rose, amethyst are color palates that are enticing to her. He likes enchanting colors, too.

Guilty Pleasures: Aquarius’ love electronic gadgets and all things unique and unusual. Vintage record players with a funky crate of wax will make your Aquarius’ holiday rock. Jimi Hendrix, Nina Simone, Billie Holiday, the Isley Brothers, will make him twist and shout.

Famous Aquarius’: Oprah Winfrey, Alicia Keys, Kerry Washington, Bob Marley, Christian Bale, Jennifer Aniston, Justin Timberlake, Michael Jordan, and Chris Rock.

Gifting: Make sure your gift is unique or unusual in some way, Aquarius’ love the novelty and variety of having something different. Since Aquarius’ love technology and travel. Purchase a weekend getaway, or plan one together on her brand new tablet. Aquarius are humanitarians, give a donation in their name or a gift that gives a portion of their proceeds to a good cause, they’ll love it!

to the top

Pisces: Feb 19–March 20

Sign: Pisces have wild, active imaginations and have great interest in fantasy.

Holiday Party Plans: A relaxing retreat to replenish at a spa, a golf course or a bar with friends makes the Pisces a happy fish. A quiet party celebrated on the exact day is most important. Significance matters to the Pisces, get it right or don’t bother.

The Pisces’ Closet: The Fish likes to easily flow in and out of clothing.   The lady Pisces likes going barefoot and in long, flowing skirts.  The Pisces male is flexible, though. He can wear  a power suit and wear it like he means it!  Just keep in mind that both male and female Pisces love shoes, even if they like to usually keep their tootsies free.

Guilty Pleasures : Pampering themselves with new shoes, foot messages and pedicures are definitely a treat. All things water inspired: aquariums, boats, sports like surfing or scuba diving and even tropical plants are loved by the Pisces.

Famous Pisces : Queen Latifah, Common, Drew Barrymore, Erykah Badu, Jon Bon Jovi, Jessica Biel, Will.i.am.

Gifting: The Pisces wants a total escape. A day at the spa or the latest fantasy novel or video game may be of interest. You can also encourage their creative side with a music, poetry, dance or photography-themed gift. Of course, you can’t go wrong if you purchase anything water themed or inspired.  A beautiful piece of artwork of an ocean scene, aquamarine jewels, turquoise pieces mounted on 14 carat gold or sterling silver: win, win, win. Nothing artificial for the Pisces, keep it 100% or keep it to yourself.

Gifting can be a challenge or it can be an enjoyable quest. If you are surprising your love with a holiday gift, trip, or party, remember it is the thought that counts. Enjoy the holidays with the ones you love!

Get your copy of “Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me” , by Celli Arenas, today!

IMG_2956.JPG

Get your copies on Amazon.com

Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me

30 Days of Dynamic Pursuit

Follow @sidetrackedbook on Instagram & Twitter

IMG_3291.PNGIMG_3290.PNG

Holiday Love: The Gift of Lingerie

Standard
Holiday Love: The Gift of Lingerie

By, Celli Arenas

Holliday gift giving time fellas…Want to keep your lady laced? Purchasing lingerie can be a daunting task. Will she want lingerie? Do you know how to buy her the right type of lingerie?

IMG_3675.JPG

I’ve done some probing on the net, and I have compiled some helpful hints regarding the great lingerie debate. Should she wear lingerie or go au naturale? Let’s explore the options.

IMG_3660.JPG

I read an article which prompted me to ask men how they felt about lingerie. The article suggests, “as you all know fellas (bros, dudes, men and boys, included) are relatively visual when it comes to arousal. Girly mags (and lad mags), strip clubs, wet clothing contests and internet pornography are more popular with us because of this. Because of this ocular love-Jones, we appreciate a good-looking pair of panties.”

IMG_3666.JPG

Then, I did an informal survey on my Facebook page about wether or not men even like the idea of lingerie. Here’s what some of the men had to say…

One reader said, “lingerie gets men excited and entices them. Even though it’s coming off, the lingerie adds flavor, sparks, and mental action to the physical action which is on the way! 😉”

Another reader, ST, added this tip, “get to know YOUR man. I personally like it but I’m also a MANIAC about boy shorts and long tee’s. The worst thing in the world for relationships is to bring ANOTHER man’s preferences into YOUR man’s bedroom.”

The conversation sparked a lot of responses regarding price and utility.

KD responds, “I’m against all over board spending, but if she feels good things go better for me in the bedroom,” so he says that he approves. He did question the heels and bikini combo though.

RB says, “they [men] like for you to show off your figure and appreciate the beauty of you. [So] He can be proud, blessed, and brag about you with his friends.”

IMG_3681.JPG

JC offers his advice, ” nothing like buying something nice you want to see [on] her.” JC, also adds, “there is something really sexy about lingerie shopping with your woman…you learn some interesting things about each other…a lot of intimacy building right there.”

IMG_3679.JPG

So now we know that men like lingerie, so let’s be clear about a few things, “let’s start by clearing up a misunderstanding that will make it easier to buy lingerie. Many people think the word “lingerie” means revealing underthings. No, no, no. Lingerie, according to the people who invented the word (the French), means sous-vêtements—a pretty little word for plain ol’ underwear.”

IMG_3661.JPG

Please understand that your partner considers lingerie to be anything from a pair of cotton Jockey drawers to a stringy little g-string. Once you learn your partner the process of shopping becomes much easier.

IMG_3668.JPG

“If it were up to the men, your underwear drawer would be overflowing with lace, frills, and garter belts. In a pretty unsurprising survey, U.K. lingerie company Bluebella found that men prefer lingerie that’s bright, fun, and barely there, while women prefer comfortable and practical picks, reports The Daily Mail. ” Find some colorful options at VS. I do find that Victoria Secret doesn’t really carry many options for fuller figured women. So, be sure that you understand her size, shape, and build.

IMG_3669.JPG

“84 percent of women say they have special sets of sex lingerie, according to the survey. You know the kind—they make you feel like vixen, highlight all your best assets, but are totally impractical for everyday wear. In fact, 89 percent of the women surveyed said that these special sets make them more sexually confident.” Yes women like pretty panties and bras. They purchase these items for themselves fellas, you are just lucky enough to get to see them!

IMG_3671.JPG

Shopping for her lingerie can be a challenge, “But there is lingerie for every style personality and the most expensive lingerie isn’t necessarily always the best. Sure, there’s something exciting about splurging on some Agent Provocateur and Kiki de Montparnasse when your budget allows, but is it really worth it?

IMG_3673.JPG

Helpful Hints

The experts advise the following: “Spend wisely: The good news is that you don’t need to spend a fortune to buy good-quality lingerie. While you’re unlikely to find a high quality bra for under $45 or great panties for under $12, many brands do mark up their stuff by a ton. So unless your picks have a lot of delicate embroidery or French lace made in traditional looms you don’t need to spend an excessive amount of money.” Find sales or ask a female family member or friend with great taste to help you make proper selections.

Also, “keep it classy: Don’t buy crotchless underwear, anything that’s described with the words “spank” or “peek-a-boo” or that involves stickers, or anything one might see in a strip show. If you want her to wear it often, choose materials that are soft and comfortable. Pay attention to what she wears now. Some women don’t like lace so if you haven’t seen her wear it, stay away.” If you are going for a romantic appeal, stay away from the rough stuff. Something pretty, dainty, and delicate will win you sweetheart points.

 

IMG_3665.JPG

If you and your lady like it a little more rough, go for bondage wear, leather, metallics, and other accessories to make your play time more interesting, remember you need to know your partner. It is the thought that counts!

IMG_3662.JPG

Whatever you choose, keep in mind that the holidays are a time for giving. If you want to give a gift that keeps on giving you may want to make it lingerie. Happy Holidays!

IMG_3664.JPG

Get your copy of “Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me” , by Celli Arenas, today!

IMG_2956.JPG

Get your copies on Amazon.com

Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me

30 Days of Dynamic Pursuit

Follow @sidetrackedbook on Instagram & Twitter

IMG_3291.PNG

IMG_3290.PNG

Holiday Love: Boost Your Libido With Tasty Treats

Standard
Holiday Love: Boost Your Libido With Tasty Treats

By, Celli Arenas

Food, glorious food. Imagine this scene, it’s so cold outside, you are alone with your favorite somebody and you have lots of time to relax and unwind. You need a few snacks to get your private party started, right? Well, here is a list of treats that will make your time together a “sure thing”. Get your favorite serving platter out and put on your thong because there’s going to be some holiday jollies going on!

The holiday menu for a fun sleigh ride goes a little something like this:

Black Raspberries

IMG_3601.JPG
(photo credit)
The blacker the berry the sweeter the juice. “This phytochemical-rich food enhances both libido and sexual endurance,” say Drs. Anna Maria and Brian Clement, authors of 7 Keys to Lifelong Sexual Vitality and directors of Hippocrates Health Institute in West Palm Beach, Florida.

The prescription for love is as follows, “Consume 10 black raspberries or a tablespoon of seeds a few hours before getting busy.” Think of it as a power booster.

Cloves

IMG_3596.JPG
(photo credit)
I love a great cup of Chai and let me tell you why. Cloves. Cloves are a “sex superfood”. “They [are] versatile when it comes to cooking: it can be brewed in hot apple cider, infused in your favorite exotic dish, or added to a chai tea latte.” Such a powerful spice and it has awesome benefits. “In India, cloves have been used to treat male sexual dysfunction for centuries.” Another added benefit, “Cloves are also used to rid bad breath, which can’t hurt your kissing skills either,” says Glassman. Nothing like kissing your spicy sweetheart with fresh breath.

Figs

IMG_3597.JPG
(photo credit)
These sweet treats make you irresistible. Figs will get your libidos pumped like teenagers in the backseat of a Jeep on a Friday night! They are so yummy, “[they are] considered excellent stimulants of fertility and enhance the secretion of pheromones,” say Dr. Clement. The doctor prescribes, “feast on up to five figs before getting it on and find out for yourself.” Figs are pretty, festive, and will definitely brighten up your holiday tray.

Watermelon

IMG_3595.JPG
(photo credit)
Beyoncé sang a song about it and researchers at the University of Guelph agree, “if you’re really looking for a sweet libido-booster, stick to a slice of watermelon.” As much as I love chocolate, it appears that watermelon packs more bang-bang-boom: “watermelon is 92 percent water, but the remaining 8 percent of fruit is jam-packed with vital nutrients for sexual health.”

Check this out: “researchers at the Texas A&M Fruit and Vegetable Improvement Center reported finding in 2008 that watermelon has ingredients that delivered Viagra-like effects to the human body’s blood vessels and could even aid in increasing libido.” So, when Beyonce sings that “she’s been drankin’ watermelon,” imagine that she is doing it for scientific purposes.

Also, “Watermelon contains a phytonutrient called citrulline, which the body converts to arginine, an amino acid that boosts nitric oxide levels in the body, which relax blood vessels in the same way a medicine like Viagra does,” says Dr. Clement. Hey, a doctor recommended it. I am offering you a second opinion. Try it, you’ll like it.

Honey

IMG_3598.JPG
I love it, honey is one of my favorite things. Honey has medicinal purposes as well as libido enhancing properties. Reportedly, “honey extracted from aphrodisiac flowers like jasmine and orchid can increase the potency in a man. The wonderful sweetness of honey in bed also takes its place in guides like the Kamasutra.”

If you are looking for that “staying power,” honey can do the trick.
Dr.’s prescription: “two spoons of honey are enough to keep you going all night long.”

There are some great food choices to boost your libido here.

Learn more about honey…honey.

Red Wine

IMG_3599.JPG
(photo credit)
Wine and dine her. The payoff is incredible. So, the good news is this, “women who drink between one and two glasses of plonk a day have a higher sex drive than those who drink less.” Red, red, wine…come close to me! But wait, there’s scientific evidence to support the vino sip, “A study of 800 women aged 18-50 by the University of Florence compared the results to the Female Sexual Function Index, an extensive survey of sexual arousal and satisfaction in women. They found that red wine drinkers scored 27.3 out of a maximum of 36, compared to 25.9 for less-frequent cork poppers and a chaste 24.4 for teetotallers.” So if she don’t sip that wine, she might not like to grind…too much? Ok,sorry.
More wino info/benefits here

Chocolate

IMG_3600.JPG
(photo credit)
Yes, chocolate is on the list! Chocolate will never be stricken from any list that I produce. It has remained for good reason too. Peep this, “eating chocolate leads to higher levels of desire, arousal, and sexual satisfaction, according to a study from an Italian university reported in The Journal of Sexual Medicine.” I rely heavily on scientific research, you see.
Also, the studies revealed the following, “female participants who consumed at least one cube of chocolate a day experienced more active libidos and better overall sexual function than those who didn’t indulge.” See, all those chocolate loving ladies can’t be wrong! So, stomp your feet and say it loud like Randy Watson, “Sexual Chocolate”…”thank you, good night.”

Enjoy your list of holiday treats that boost the libido. Eat up buttercups, happy holidays!

IMG_3602.JPG

Get your copy of “Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me” , by Celli Arenas, today!

IMG_2956.JPG

Get your copies on Amazon.com

Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me

30 Days of Dynamic Pursuit

Follow @sidetrackedbook on Instagram & Twitter

IMG_3291.PNG

IMG_3290.PNG

Holiday Love : Emotionally Unavailable + Intimacy Phobic = Cold Pressed

Standard
Holiday Love : Emotionally Unavailable + Intimacy Phobic = Cold Pressed

By, Celli Arenas

Today I read that there weren’t many articles out there about emotional unavailability and intimacy phobias. I’m not one to resist a challenge, so here we go…ho, ho, ho (no pun intended).

Have you ever been in a relationship with someone emotionally unavailable? How do you know if your sweetie is blowing you off or is really, truly, extremely busy?

IMG_3551.JPG
Photo Credit

The red flags are waving: need some clues? Consider this: he’s evasive and makes too many excuses. She is inept when it comes to talking about feelings or the relationships, childish even. He uses anger, criticizes you, and uses activities to create distance between you. Energy and vibes don’t lie, people do. If you continue to accept excuses from him/ her you will end up feeling rejected, depressed, and unimportant. Please excuse yourself from that pitiful party and shake it off. It is holiday time, and that means holiday love! Don’t be glum, just do some reflection.

According to expert, Darlene Lancer, JD, MFT, “There are several types of unavailability, both temporary and chronic. Some people have always been unavailable due to mental illness or a troubled childhood. Others temporarily make something a higher priority than a relationship, such as a family obligation, education, project, or a health concern.” Be careful about becoming complacent with being last on the list all of the time.

IMG_3547.JPG
Photo Credit

Failed Relationship Trauma

“People recently divorced or widowed may temporarily not be ready to get involved with someone new. In the middle are those who are too afraid to risk falling in love because they’ve been hurt by one or more relationships, which may include being hurt by a parent when they were a child.” Childhood issues manifest into adult problems. Often times, we overcompensate for those issues or we withdraw. Either way, until we learn to cope effectively, intimacy and availability will be disrupted.

“Often these different reasons for unavailability overlap, and it’s difficult to ascertain whether the problem is chronic or will pass.” It becomes a plague to the relationship. Growth is significantly hindered and frustration replaces effective communication.

IMG_3548.JPG
Photo Credit

Signs of Emotional Unavailability

1. Flattery-“Men who are too flattering may also be adept listeners and communicators, like snake charmers. Often good at short-term intimacy.” One or two night stand, at best.

2. Control– “Someone who won’t be inconvenienced to modify his or her routine.” It’s all about her! Her schedule, her plan, her time, her event, her place, her suggestions. Selfish, there is no room at the Inn.

3. Listen– “Your date may hint or even admit that he or she isn’t good at relationships or doesn’t believe in or isn’t ready for marriage.” This is not a test of the emergency broadcast system. He/She IS NOT TRYING TO BE WITH YOU!!! Slide…yes, hook up…yes, hang out once in a blue moon…yes. Marry YOU…nope.

4. The past
“Find out if the person has had a long-term relationship and why it ended. You may learn that prior relationships ended at the stage when intimacy normally develops.” The proof is in the back story. If all relationships come to a screeching halt, buckle up! You’re next.

5. Perfection seekers- “These people look for and find a fatal flaw in the opposite sex and then move on. The problem is that they’re scared of intimacy.” You may hear excuses of physical imperfections (her body, his nose, her skin color, his/her hair or lack there of) ; financial woes (he/she is broke) and even worse, the problem could be that everything is too perfect! In any case, these people are never satisfied.

IMG_3550.JPG
Photo Credit

Reflection

Are you emotionally available? Are you commitment phobic? Ask yourself some of Lancer’s questions.

Q. Are you angry at the opposite sex? Do you like jokes at their expense?
A. If so, you may need to heal from past wounds before you’re comfortable getting close to someone.
Q. Do you make excuses to avoid getting together?
A. I think you get the hint.

Q. Do you think you’re so independent you don’t need anyone?
A. Seriously?

Q. Do you fear falling in love because you may get hurt?
A. I think we know where this road leads.

IMG_3549.JPG
Photo Credit

The holidays are a reflective time, especially with the new year approaching. Embrace the possibility of being emotionally available and intimate with someone, have something real. The gift of love pays off year round, not just for a few days in December.

IMG_3552.JPG

Discover more here:
Lancer, D. (2012). How to Spot Emotional Unavailability. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 9, 2014, from http://psychcentral.com/lib/how-to-spot-emotional-unavailability/00012770

Get your copy of “Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me” , by Celli Arenas, today!

IMG_2956.JPG

Get your copies on Amazon.com

Sidetracked: He Used To Love Me

30 Days of Dynamic Pursuit

Follow @sidetrackedbook on Instagram & Twitter

IMG_3291.PNG

IMG_3290.PNG